Something to be Thankful For

Over the past year, I have really began to reassess the way I view the  blessings God has given me.  I used to be a real complainer about all the things I didn't have, and I still do complain at times and often, or I am at least tempted to complain.   Lately though, the Lord has really began to change my heart from a complaining heart to a grateful heart-I'm not sure if it's the decision to live more "sacrificially" although I wouldn't say I have sacrificed much, or if it's the fact I have developed a better understanding of the Lord's calling on my life as a follower of Christ which in turn will cause a person to live sacrificially, or if it's that my constant prayer has been for the Lord to break my heart for what breaks His. Either way, with the day devoted to giving thanks coming up soon I feel it necessary to write about a few of the infinite number of things I have to be thankful for. 

I really can't write enough words to describe all the blessings God has poured on me, and to name all the things I am thankful for this year is a daunting task.  But I will try.

I am thankful...

for the husband my Father gave me thirteen months ago.  It is a great blessing to have a man like Seth Richardson to walk beside me for my time here on earth (until the Lord decides to take one of us home).

for a family- the family I was born into and married into as well.   I could not ask for better parents- parents that have loved me since before I was born and sacrificed so much for me.  And my parents-in-love have shown so much grace and love to me as I married their son, praying for me for years before they even knew my name.  And the many precious Aunts and Uncles and Cousins who I love so dearly even through distance.

for my church family- the amazing body of Christ the Lord has given me to serve alongside with and learn and see more of Christ's love through.

for my precious friendships, new and old.   The Lord has given me so many amazing friendship. Some friendships were only for a season and are kept up with through social media. Some friendships are deep to the core yet physical distance keeps us from talking every day yet I am encouraged and challenged by them daily, and when I do get the opportunity to spend time with those friends, it's always as if we never missed a beat.   And then my new friendships with ladies who spiritually challenge me now, the ones who I am currently serving with and learning to love in this new season of life.   

for my job.  The job I work so that I may give back to the City of Gadsden and mostly to my Father. The job that allows me to provide for my family's needs.  The job that allows me to develop relationships with my coworkers.

for my health.  The health that gives me energy to wake up every day. The health that allows me to walk and run, see and hear, serve and work, and one day bear a child.

for changing seasons.  The symbolism that comes with the changing seasons.  It's refreshing.

for my education.

for the food God supplies to me daily.

for my home.

for..

clean water  and a place to lay my head every night, sunsets and sunrises, the ability to be able to choose my own style and show my personality, coffee and art, sunshine and rain,  music and dancing, runner's high, mountains and beaches, peanut butter, and the list goes on..

But mostly I'm thankful for the Trinity- Father, Son and Holy Spirit that lives with in me.  I'm thankful for a Savior who gives rest to the weary, who holds my life in his hands, and has given me salvation that I don't deserve.

I'm thankful for my Savior who is never a never changing constant. And when all the other things I am thankful for are stripped away and they will be because we living in a dying, sin filled world, my hope is in Someone who created me for His glory, someone who is never changing and is infinite in majesty and love.   And that is something to be forever grateful for!

 Oh come, let us sing to the Lord;

let us make a joyful noise to the rock of our salvation!

Let us come into his presence with thanksgiving;

let us make a joyful noise to him with songs of praise!

For the Lord is a great God,

and a great King above all gods.

In his hand are the depths of the earth;

the heights of the mountains are his also.

The sea is his, for he made it,

and his hands formed the dry land. 

(Psalm 95:1-5, ESV)

One Year

October 7, 2012 I told Seth I would be united with him in marriage until death do we part. On that day, I made a vow to Seth that I would love him and honor him no matter the circumstance.  I entered into a covenant of oneness with Seth before my Father and many special friends and family so dear to us.   It was a day I cherish. Every moment. Every word spoken. Every person in attendance.  It was a day full of so much joy.

Now one year later, I will tell you I am the most blessed girl to have Seth Richardson as my husband.  I truly, truly  am.   Seth is so patient with me. He is my protector, and he is my steady.  He is honest with me even when it's hard.  He speaks truth in my life and knows the Word and quotes the Word to me when I doubt.  He is fun and loving, strong and handsome, and so very talented.  He makes me laugh several times a day and always knows when something is bothering me and attempts to "fix it". Not to mention, he raves over my cooking and thinks I am beautiful. ( What girl doesn't want to hear that? ;) He loves me, and  he proves his love to me daily even on the days I don't make it very easy to love. Our first year of marriage has been wonderful, and I wouldn't trade doing life with Seth for anything. There is no one else I'd rather wake up beside, cook for, and share weekends with.

One year later, I will also tell you my first year of marriage has not been so "easy breezy"-at least for me it hasn't. I thought marriage would be the time I'd learn a lot about Seth, and I have. Our pastor in counseling told us to get "Ph. D.'s" in each other, and we are slowly but surely working on it. But really more than anything, I've learned a lot about myself- and a lot of hard stuff.  I've learned I'm more selfish than I could ever imagine, and I'm also more codependent than I ever would have admitted to myself.  This year I've pitched a lot of fits, and I've cried a lot of tears. Not because Seth had done anything wrong, but because my ugly flesh had finally been revealed to me-the flesh that noone else had ever really seen or at least confronted me about.    Since a couple of months after our wedding day, I do believe my flesh began to rage war within me. I'd never had anyone so close to me speak so much hard truth into my life.  It's almost like God decided it was time to fine-tune me and begin to pick out the nitty gritty sinful details of my flesh.  My instant reaction to a lot of this truth revealed about my life and attitude this past year has been "no-way, not-me. I'm fine just the way I am".  I wanted every thing to be done my way, and I sincerely thought my way was the best since no one had every confronted me about my "ways" before. But   "my way" clearly is not the best.  God's calling for me is and has been to  give up myself and truly become "one" with Seth and choose His ways together.

I really had no clue how God would use marriage to bring me closer to Him and make me more like Him. I had no idea how God would use it to sanctify me.   I know now.    God knew I needed someone opposite of me- someone to state the truth to me and tell me really "how it is", someone who is steady and opinionated,someone who is stubborn, and maybe even someone who is a little "harsh" and not afraid to hurt my feelings.  I see it so clearly now.  I've been so challenged to stand up for myself and be confrontational when confrontation is required instead of running away once a disagreement would begin .  I'm beginning to appreciate opinionated people instead of freezing up and crawling into a hole when opinions are forced on me.  I'm understanding I can't say yes to every thing even with my servant's heart and that not everybody has the same needs as me. I realize now I can't please everyone, and I should only strive to do God's will and please Him.  Otherwise, I will simply be overwhelmed and exhausted-unable to do the things I do well well.  I'm learning to stay true to who I am and the interests God has given me, and that I shouldn't allow others to influence who God has made me to be or called me to be.   Mostly, I've come to realize even more so how in desperate need of a  Savior I am and how spending time with the Lord every day is so vital to me and my relationship with Seth and others.  And when I'm emotionally exhausted from trying "purify" myself on my own, God simply reminds me I do not have to  and cannot do this on my own. He gives me rest. And oh, how I NEED my Father.

One year later, I am so grateful for the gift of marriage. I am so continually astounded by God's faithfulness.  Marriage is such a blessing. The picture of God's love I see through my own marriage is beautiful.  Our perfect Father has loved us no matter the circumstance- even through our daily occurrence of unfaithfulness to Him.  No matter how many fits I pitch or tears I cry or mistakes I make, Seth still loves me. It's undeserved love.  And of course the love we receive from Christ cannot be compared to, but to imagine a love infinitely more perfect and unending than the love I receive from my husband is unfathomable.

So today, one year later all I can do is praise God for this gift of unity He has given to me and Seth.  Not only has God given me to Seth to be his "help-mate", He has given me better understanding of His great love for me.  He is purifying me to be more like Him. And I can't praise Him enough!

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” (Genesis 2:18, ESV)

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her bythe washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body.  (Ephesians 5:25-30, ESV)

I will sing of the steadfast love of the Lord, forever;

with my mouth I will make known your faithfulness to all generations. (Psalm 89:1, ESV)

Happy One Year Anniversary to my best friend and love of my life!  I'm still in awe that God chose me to be your wife!  I love you, Seth!

Twenty-Five

"I will give to the Lord the thanks due to his righteousness, and I will sing praise to the name of the Lord, the Most High." Psalm 7:17 

"I will give thanks to the Lord with my whole heart; I will recount all of your wonderful deeds. I will be glad and exult in you; I will sing praise to your name, O Most High." Psalm 9:1-2
Today I turn twenty-five, and that number is a little overwhelming for me. I know it's not old, and I still have so much youth in me but I feel like it's this strange milestone I've reached.  It's not so much the number twenty-five as to where I'm at opposed to where I've been.  It's this new season I am in that makes twenty-five seem so overwhelming, and to be honest it's a little frightening.  I've been finished with school for over two years.  I've been working a full time job since one month after I graduated.  I am an adult.  I'm married to my best friend, and I absolutely love it! But with marriage comes responsibilities in the home and.. learning to give up self.  My very best friends are scattered all over the state and country, and to be honest making new friends like those I had in high school and college has not been the easiest feat, although God has definitely blessed me with new ones.   I love the life God has given me, and I am so exceptionally abundantly blessed, but all the changes that have occurred in the course of the year have been a  little bit of a struggle for me. 

With all that being said, I choose today to allow my identity to be in Christ and Christ only- not a number or circumstances. I choose today to only sing songs of Praise to my King.  I choose  to celebrate the life God has given me and the places He has taken me and will take me.  I'm so thankful for the husband I have and the man of God he is and the truth he brings to my life.  I love serving Seth and learning how to be a help-mate for him.  I'm thankful for the job God has provided me so that I can give back to Him.  I find so much joy in laboring for my Lord and Savior.  I'm so thankful for the consistency my job has brought me and the opportunity to make new friends and build new relationships with brothers and sisters in Christ. I'm thankful to be able to serve in the same church every Sunday. I'm thankful for the lessons God brings me everyday.  I'm thankful for twenty-five years of learning experiences, and twelve years of growing in Christ!   He will use my experiences and my knowledge of Him to lead others through valleys.  And I am thrilled for the journey He is taking me on, and the works He is going to do through me.  I will trust Him as He leads me through this  season, and I will give Him all the praise!

"And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ."  Philippians 1:6

"I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20


Side note: August is my favorite month of the year. I always loved going shopping with my Mom for school clothes and supplies for my birthday. I've always loved the start of a new school year with new classes and teachers and seeing friends after a long summer break.  And to be honest, the past three Augusts I've missed "going back to school".   

Submission

As a newly wed, I am learning what submission really looks like.  God tells us in His Word that wives are to submit to their husbands as the Church submits to God.

 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. (Ephesians 5:22-24, ESV)

Merriam Webster's definition of submit is

1a : to yield oneself to the authority or will of another : surrender

b : to permit oneself to be subjected to something <had to submit to surgery>

2: to defer to or consent to abide by the opinion or authority of another 

If I am honest, this submission thing is not always easy. God told us that it wouldn't be at the fall of man way back in the Garden of Eden.  Because of the fall, women  desire to rule over their husbands, and my own flesh often demonstrates this desire.

 To the woman he said,

“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;

in pain you shall bring forth children.

Your desire shall be for your husband,

and he shall rule over you.” (Genesis 3:16, ESV)

So let me be real with you all. 

My husband is very authoritative by nature (I'm so grateful for this quality in Seth) which makes it less likely for me to be the ruler over my household and easier for me to play my part as wife by submitting to husband. I have a personality that hates confrontation and arguments. I aim to please everyone, so naturally I am a submissive person, but I am human and I am selfish- let me reiterate, I am SELFISH. And if I have an opinion about something, then I am right or at least I believe I am right whether it's true or not. And sometimes when things don't go my way, I become angry and frustrated.   My anger and frustration almost always comes out in tears-tears that I normally can hold in until I'm alone, and those that are extremely close to me ( my mom, dad, brother, and unfortunately now Seth) have sadly seen me "pitch a fit".  

Seth and I are completely opposite in personality (most of you can testify), and because of our difference in genders, we naturally have some different interests and hobbies. This difference in personalities and interests causes a little bit of disagreement which is ok because I know God uses these differences to make us more rounded and more like Him. But there has been a day or maybe two when we are in disagreement and I'll nod my head yes to him but  when he leaves the room, I pitch a complete fit. I stomp my feet and scream (in my quiet voice so the neighbors won't here) and then I cry in self-pity because I never "get my way".  I kind of act like a child having a temper tantrum- awful and embarrassing I know!. This in no way is submitting to my husband.  This in every way is me being selfish, prideful, and ugly.  Even though most times I wait until I'm "alone" to pitch my fit,  my heart is not in submission to him. When I act in this way, I'm basically throwing myself a pity party which is sin in itself and saying my husband doesn't know best and I don't trust him.   It's pretty much the same as me pitching a fit and crying to God after He doesn't do something the way I asked Him to.  When I do this, I'm telling God that He doesn't have my trust- I don't trust the Creator of the Universe with my life. That's an extremely  bold statement to say to the One who laid His on life down for my sin-the One who is sovereign over ALL things. 

Submission isn't easy in this sin-filled world. Trusting something you can't see requires Faith. But Who else would I trust with my life? And marrying and submitting to another human  is more difficult than that.  I mean God doesn't make mistakes, but we as humans do daily so as expected, giving another person full authority over yourself is not easy. 

God's given us the power of prayer though, and I praise God for the husband I have who is faithful to Him, one who is above reproach, and one who loves the Lord and loves me dearly.  I thank God for being able to change me and my thoughts through prayer, and His Holy Spirit which works through me and will give me a spirit of humility and selflessness on days when I want it to be "all about me".  I want to trust my husband with every decision, praying that the Holy Spirit will be present in every dimension of his life and my life.  I want to be submissive to my husband. I want to be submissive to God.  I can't do it alone.   I can't do it alone. I CAN'T DO IT ALONE.  And praise Jesus, He hasn't asked me to.

So today God, I'm trusting in You to lead me through every disagreement that I may submit joyfully to my husband.  God, I need your forgiveness and grace daily. Break my pride, God. Make me humble. Because I need you.  I need you, Father.


And Seth, thank you for forgiving me when I allow my ugly flesh to super-cede the Holy Spirit. Thank you for loving me despite all my flaws. And thank you for respecting me and loving me like Christ loves the church. I love you. 

Unequally Yoked? 1 Kings 11:1-4

Now King Solomon loved many foreign women, along with the daughter of Pharaoh: Moabite, Ammonite, Edomite, Sidonian, and Hittite women, from the nations concerning which the Lord had said to the people of Israel, "You shall not enter into marriage with them, neither shall they with you, for surely they will turn away your heart after their gods." Solomon clung to these in love. He had 700 wives, princesses, and 300 concubines. And his wives turned away his heart. For when Solomon was old his wives turned away his heart after other gods, and his heart was not wholly true to the Lord his God, as was the heart of David his father. (1 Kings 11:1-4 ESV)


 Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What accord has Christ with Belial? Or what portion does a believer share with an unbeliever? What agreement has the temple of God with idols? For we are the temple of the living God; as God said,

“I will make my dwelling among them and walk among them,

and I will be their God,

and they shall be my people.

Therefore go out from their midst,

and be separate from them, says the Lord,

and touch no unclean thing;

then I will welcome you,

and I will be a father to you,

and you shall be sons and daughters to me,

says the Lord Almighty.” (2 Corinthians 6:14-18, ESV)

1 Kings 11 is a biblical example of why one should not date an unbeliever. If you date an unbeliever with the reasoning that you will be able to "change" him or her.. You need to back it on up and hop back over the friends only line. Chances are you will not change them and you will fall. Imagine standing up and trying to hold or pull another person up. No matter how strong you are, you will eventually fall. Dating relationships  typically are deep relationships, and a deep relationship apart from the Body of Christ holds not accountability. God's word tells us we are not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers. There are no excuses for a believer to even think for a second they can date an unbeliever.  And an unbeliever includes those who say they are Christians but show no fruit..    And I've been in those shoes before.  I've dated an unbeliever thinking "I can change him- I can show him Jesus."  I thought I was invincible and I could date anybody and stand firm. But I quickly realized this was not the case as I was not being encouraged or built up any longer, and the chains of sin began wrap around me.   Praise God my experience with this only lasted about 3 months, and my conviction led me to awakening and repentance realizing my need for God in every dimension of my life.  I praise Him for pulling me out of that miry pit before I got too deep.   Our God cares and that's why He has given us the Word.

God told Solomon not to enter marriage with the foreign women because they would turn his heart after their gods.  Solomon married them anyway and clung to them, and these women did turn his heart after other gods.  He did what was evil in sight of the Lord and God tore the kingdom of Israel from Solomon's hands leaving only one tribe in Israel of the twelve tribes for Solomon to reign for the sake of David and Jerusalem. (1 Kings 11:9-13)


God's command to Solomon is true for us today.  And the consequences are tough.  Our decisions we make over who we allow ourselves to date and marry can affect generations to come. Be wise. Be alert. And be of sound mind.

 Be sober-minded;be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world. (1 Peter 5:8-9, ESV)

Girls, if you are struggling with the temptation to date an unbeliever or are already in a dating relationship with an unbeliever and not sure how to pull out and stay out of the miry pit it's sucked you into, I would love to talk with you, cry with you, and help hold you accountable.  I'm a message away :).  God loves you, and He's won the battle for you if you'll only surrender it to Him.  And I love you as my sister in Christ.





With much much love,

Allison

Obsession

What can I do with my obsession
With the things I cannot see
Is there madness in my being
Is it the wind that moves the trees
Sometimes You're further than the moon
Sometimes You're closer than my skin
And You surround me like a winter fog
You've come and burned me with a kiss

And I'm so filthy with my sin
I carry pride like a disease
You know I'm stubborn, Lord, and I'm longing to be close
Your burn me deeper than I know
And I feel lonely without hope
And I feel desperate
Without vision
You wrap around me like a winter coat
You come and free me like a bird

 And my heart burns for You
And my heart burns...for You


-David Crowder

oh dear Jesus,


my heart. it burns for You. i'm obsessed with You. You are my Creator, my perfect and wonderful Heavenly Father. You are my Husband-my Lover. You are the soul Satisfier, the Meeter of all my needs. You are my Forgiver and my Provider. You are Who makes me Whole. You are my Everything. and i...


i am a coward. i am prideful. i am selfish and out of control. i am fearful and afraid. i am lonely and broken. i am unfaithful and unkind. i am a liar. and i am a sinner.


but Jesus,


i am OBSESSED with You, because You gave me grace when I didn't deserve it. You have had mercy on me and have loved me and shown me what true love is. You laid down your life for me. You showed me it doesn't matter what my profession or social status is. You are God and You give me hope. You free me from my pride, and my selfishness, and my fear, and my loneliness.  You give me a new song to sing, and a new dance to dance. You are God and You have given me life.


and God,

i want to lay down my life for You.
all of it.
forever.
it is Yours.


 i am Your daughter and i am Your bride.
 i am Your follower.
 i'll mess this up. but God, i trust You- Your grace is sufficient for me. 

Stepping Into the Boat

Last night at church, we held our kick-off service for our "Gathered-to-Go" Missions Celebration.

Our church has adopted the Global Focus program which will mold us into an Acts 1:8 Church.  We are called to Go, and Global Focus will help equip us to do that. Taking part in Global Focus requires us to celebrate what God's doing in and by our Church throughout the nations each year.  This is our first Celebration!  And it is a celebration indeed as we have missionaries that our church sponsors from all over the world here in Gadsden for the week! It's so exciting to see God at work around the world!

 But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the end of the earth.  (Acts 1:8, ESV)
 
Part of the celebration requires us to evaluate our lives and commit to God to be faithful. We want to continue sending out members of our church into Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and the ends of the earth. And so last night at our kick off service we had Dr. Danny Wood deliver a message. (Danny is the pastor of Shades Mountain Baptist Church in Birmingham which has been involved with Global Focus for about 10 years I believe.)  Anyway, Dr. Wood preached on Mathew 8:23-27 where the disciples chose to trust in Christ and step in the boat with him even in the midst of a storm.   Dr. Wood told us that we will be one of two people- we will stand along the shore and watch or we will step into the boat with Christ and follow after Him.  

23 And when he got into the boat, his disciples followed him. 24 And behold, there arose a great storm on the sea, so that the boat was being swamped by the waves; but he was asleep. 25 And they went and woke him, saying, “Save us, Lord; we are perishing.” 26 And he said to them, “Why are you afraid, O you of little faith?” Then he rose and rebuked the winds and the sea, and there was a great calm. 27 And the men marveled, saying, “What sort of man is this, that even winds and sea obey him?” (Matthew 8:23-27, ESV)

Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. (Matthew 10:39, ESV)

I want to step into the boat with Christ. I want to follow after my Savior and I want to lose my life in order to save it. I want to sacrifice my life for God. While some sacrifices I'll begin to make in order to further the kingdom of God are obvious being black and white, others are a little gray.  However, the black and white and gray go hand and hand because they both involve the same thing- finances.  But the gray involves so much more. This gray is a desire God's put in my heart but there's a lot of preparation it entails including financial and the financial preparation is where my fear lies.   Is my fear God-given fear because the timing isn't right or is it fear from Satan?  Is God calling me to stay-put for now and learn to be content? Or am I being complacent because where I am is easy and comfortable?  Is God calling me to leave the easy and comfortable and stop being complacent or is He calling me to be content a little while longer? Is He telling me not to worry about the finances, that He's in control? Or is He saying you've still got a car and an education to pay for and those are the consequences for your past prideful choices? 

I trust God to lead me. I trust God for discernment. And I trust He will make His plan known to me if I am willing to take hold, and I am. I see my fear, but I won't live in it because I know God will cast out all my fear and give me perfect peace. (1 John 4:18)


(Also, I realize I used a lot of "I" in this post instead of "we".  Seth and I are in unison on the life we will live for Christ. We both realize our need to lose our "life" and follow after God. However, the things we will sacrifice do look a little different as we are two completely different people(made one by God)- male/female being one large difference.  Of course naturally as we are "one in flesh", we will both need a perfect peace from God in all decisions)



 

Good Friday

The idea of having a God who would sacrifice his Son-human yet knew no sin- overwhelms me.  After reading through the Old Testament and understanding the laws the people had to abide by to stay clean, holy, and righteous, I now understand in greater depth the gift God gave us on this day- the miraculous gift of life when three days later He arose from the dead, and after spending some time on earth ascending to heaven and leaving His Spirit to live among us.   

We were terrible people.  God gave us all these true promises.  As He led us out of Egypt, he supplied us with all our needs and promised us a Holy Land full of milk and honey.  But we were selfish and impatient.  We wanted the “good” things now.  We served all these man made idols like they were going to give us what we wanted.  God knew our needs. He promised to take care of us.  He gave us laws so we could stay holy and right with Him.  And yet we abandoned him over and over again-we did what was “evil in the sight of God”. And through all our sin, all our rejection to Him, God loved us enough that He sent His very perfect, only Son to this earth to be the ultimate sacrifice for our sins.

Jesus was perfect. He lived a perfect life.  He wasn’t sent to earth to have “form or majesty that we should look at him” (Isaiah 53:2), but He was borne of a virgin girl-a commoner- and He held the occupation of a carpenter.  He was tempted the same as us and yet He never gave to temptation.  He loved EVERYONE even those people who were rejected by others.  And he was persecuted and ridiculed.  He-the perfect and spotless lamb- gave his life on a cross.  He shed his own blood.  He died for your sins and my sin so that we could be free from the law (Romans 7) and have His Spirit live in us. 

Praise the Lord. Hosanna in the Highest. Jesus. Messiah. Name Above All Names. Worthy of All Praise.  Blessed Redeemer. Emmanuel.     

God of Love

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.  Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. This is love, not that we have loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.  Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought to love one another.  No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us."

1 John 4:7-12

The past couple of months, I have been placed in a few situations where I've had to serve people with love that are honestly just not that easy to serve.  In these situations, I could feel anger and bitterness trying to overtake me.  But every time Satan has began to have his way, God has taken me back to what He's commanded me to do- Love One Another as I love myself, Not Love One another as they have loved me. He's taken me back to His Amazing LOVE for me.  He has reminded me that He carried the Cross (death) for me and my sins. He died for my selfishness, my pride, my worry, my envy of others, and the slew of many other character flaws I have, and He died for all others too. Because I know Him personally I'm able to have His Spirit live in and throughout me. His Spirit which produces fruit of love and joy and peace and patience and kindness and goodness and gentleness and faithfulness and self-control (Galatians 5:22-24). If I abide in Him, He'll abide in me (John 15:4). If I love Him, I'll love others sincerely.  I can't love God if I hate my brother(1 John 4:20).   Though my flesh says burn those who aren't easy to serve or love,  I'm able to act in love because of Christ's Spirit living inside of me.  I'm so humbled because I KNOW I can't love others genuinely without Him.  I cry with joy because God is working in me- He is testing me (James 1:2)- and I am able to respond in love because of His love for me! 

How great is our God that He doesn't ask us to do things on our own.  How great is our God that He loves us enough to send His Spirit to live inside of us (Acts 2) if we choose to trust in Him. God is faithful always and His words are true.  When He tells us if we will abide in Him then He will abide in us and we will produce His fruit-it is true. I cry with joy today because God is showing me how to love the "least of these". He's showing me how to love the Pharisees and the Tax Collectors, the Prostitutes and the Young Rich Rulers.  While the battle still rages and my flesh does win too often, I'm so thankful my God loves me enough to have already won the battle for me. I do and will continue to fail. I will have a terrible attitude and I will act in pride and I will sin, because I haven't the strength to be perfect.  But my God is perfect and He will lovingly discipline me yet forgive me for all my sins!  Oh how I'm in need of a Savior! Every single day, I need a Savior!

So today I will continue to challenge myself to dig into His Word more, because without His Word I can't know Him or His will for me... When I am in the Word, I'm more likely to choose Him and bear His fruit allowing me to respond with love to those who are anything but love in return. If I am not in the Word, Satan sadly has his way, and harsh words are said while anger and bitterness and pride and worry boil up inside of me.  

I challenge you along with myself to study His Word, memorize scripture, and pray without ceasing.  Without a loving vertical relationship with our Father, we are unable to have a loving horizontal relationship with each other. 

God is good, and oh He is so faithful. He is Love. And only through His love are we able to love others.  God has called us to love one another. He's called us to love our enemies and pray for them (Matthew 5:44).  After all love does covers a multitude of sin. (1 Peter 4:8) So let us love.

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.  And those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with it passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also keep in step with the Spirit."  Galatians 5:22-25

"I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing."  John 15:5

"We love because he first love us. If anyone loves says "I love God," and hates his brother, he is a liar, for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.  And this commandment we have from him: whoever loves God must also love his brother." 1 John 4:19-21

"Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trails of various kinds, for you know that the testing of faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing."  James 1:2-4

"You have heard that it was said, 'You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I say to you, 'Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and send rain on the just and unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what more are you doing than others? Do not eve the Gentiles do the same?  You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.'" Matthew 5:43-48

"Above all, keep loving each other earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins."  1 Peter 4:8

October 7, 2012

I thought I'd share a few pictures from the best day of my life with more to come at a later date.

Mom, Dad, and brother.

sweet best friends

My new precious and beautiful family.

Is he not the most handsome ever?  I love my husband and his heart for God.

The most joy filled day.

My Eternal Valentine

Just a little something I wrote last Valentine's Day (2012). 

For the first time in my twenty three years of life, I have a boy here on earth who will call me his valentine tomorrow. Forever I thought of Valentine's Day as a silly holiday-Actually, I think I had a bitterness towards the day. I always joked about the day but deep down I was dreaming of the day I would actually have someone shower me with love on that day.  

This year I  am finding love in the day not only because I have a boy to spend the day with but because it suddenly hit me that for all twenty three years of my life I've had the ultimate Valentine every single day of my life.   I have a Savior that died for me. He knows the depths of my heart and He still continues to love me. He knows my every thought and move, and HE STILL LOVES ME. He'll always love me. It's kind of crazy to think that I've spent so many years being slighty bitter about a holiday of love when all along I've had the greatest love of all.   I am so overwhelmed that I have a God who sent His only Son to this earth to live a perfect life just so that he could be persecuted and condemned for loving others; He was nailed to a cross to become the ultimate sacrifice for my sins and rose again so that I can live for eternity.  

None of us should feel unloved today or tomorrow or any day because we all have the greatest love of all, a love that has no depth or end, "a love that surpasses knowledge" (Ephesians 3:19), AN EVERLASTING LOVE!  

"Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends."  John 15:13

"Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God.  Anyone whoe does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him.  IN this love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.  No one has ever seen God; if we love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us."  1 John 4:7-12

This year (2013), I have a HUSBAND for my Valentine- one who shows me amazing love daily-  and I am SO blessed. I thank God for Seth daily, sometimes hourly.  But Seth and I are both human, and we fail each other. Praise God for the gift of forgiveness, grace, and mercy.

 While Seth will only be my Husband and Valentine for my days here on earth,  one thing will always remain the same- I have a perfect, unfailing Valentine for eternity. One who knew me before I entered my mother's womb, and I praise my Father in Heaven this day and forevermore!

Looking to the things that are unseen, things that are eternal.

"So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal."  2 Corinthians 4:16-18

It is a reoccurring theme for my life to become completely overwhelmed by busyness and a to-do list a mile long.    And the preceding scripture is one I remind myself of often, although not often enough.   In this new season of my life (being a married woman), I'm learning I cannot be the perfect wife, friend,  or daughter. As hard as I try and push, I'm going to fail, and I'm going to become weary and overwhelmed by the day-to-day tasks.... unless I allow God to take control.... unless I allow God's grace to live through me... unless I allow myself to be humbled.

I can't do this without HIM. I can't live life with joy and love and patience and humility without GOD. Without fixing my eyes on the unseen- eternity.

My outer self is wasting away, but my inner self is being renewed day by day.  That is so refreshing, knowing that if I fix my eyes on Christ and rest in Him, He will renew me from the inside out so that I won't be weary.  Knowing that the everyday trials and chores are only momentary, allows me to live more joyfully taking heart that Christ has overcome the world (John 16:33).   It is my prayer that I will surrender my burdens to God, choosing to serve others with humility, love, joy, and selflessness.

2012, Change, Growth, and Hope in the Lord

2011 was a year of change for me, and I honestly thought 2012 would not hold a candle to 2011 as far as change is concerned. But 2012 remained consistent in the amount of change that would occur while I began the year with a  change in job which included change in finances followed by an engagement and marriage to the love of my life (let's face it, getting married is a pretty large commitment).  Marriage included a change in name, a change in responsibilities and a change in my self centered life all along with the gain of another amazing set of parents, the most wonderful Paw Paw anyone could ask for as well as a fantastic aunt and uncle and three cousins! :)   2012 has included a new church along with new friendships and community here in Gadsden, AL.

I look back on 2011, and I entered the year with much more fear than excitement. After spending nearly 20 years of my life in a classroom, I knew that was going to be ending and I had no idea what the future would help.  I struggled finding hope in God and trusting Him with my future.  But God is so good and so faithful, and showed me that His perfect love expels all fear (1 John 4:18).  And that He gives a spirit not of fear, but of power and love and sound mind ( 2 Timothy 1:7).  He showed me through a series of events, that I am wasting time worrying about the future because He is sovereign and has promised to take care of me (Matthew 6:25-34). 

 2012 brought a lot of changes, but praise God I was able to face these changes with a new hope and trust.  I had learned that change was good as long as I sought the Heavenly Father and trusted in Him. I remember being in my last semester in college (Spring 2011), and all I wanted was to settle down- to have stability.  I thought this constant change in life and this constant unknown of what I was going to do once I graduated was the scariest and most miserable thing.  Over the past year, God has shown me that change is good.  If there was no change, there wouldn't be growth.  Growth requires change.  And as long as I'll trust God with my future, the change will be a lot less stressful and a lot more exciting.  My prayer is that this coming year, change will be a part of my daily life.  I pray that God will radically change me through my thoughts, words, and actions.  And my prayer is that Seth and I will not have a spirit of fear, but that we will seek God and trust Him wholeheartedly to lead us to do "whatever, whenever, wherever".